Riding the Rollercoaster

Nothing in this world could have prepared me for the extreme joy and desperate heartache of having teenagers. It is like riding a roller coaster of emotions and I am the passenger. God is good to give me moments of joy and times when I feel that things are going well. Last night, we had an amazing time together just hanging out, watching TV and talking. I went to sleep praising Him for the blessing of my beautiful daughter.

This morning was a different story. After several attempts to remain positive, I found myself giving in to anger. She just wore me down with her sullenness, anger and lack of cooperation. Tears began to flow after I dropped her off (the slamming of the door was the final straw). How is it possible that a teenager can bring a grown woman to the point of tears? My goodness.

Praise God that his mercies are new every morning. In Lamentations 3:22 it says:
²² Because of the LORD's great love we are not consumed,
for his compassions never fail.
²³ They are new every morning;
great is your faithfulness.

The Lord reminds me that his love for me never changes. His grace and mercy are sufficient for me. I will wake in the morning with a new chance to be a source of grace in the lives of my children. Tomorrow is a new day.

Empty Eggs

The wonderful thing about Easter is that it's a holiday geared around the resurrection of God's son! What a great thing to celebrate! In church we talked about how the best egg is the "empty" egg. The Sunday school kids actually blew the stuff out of a real egg (my youngest convinced the teachers that blowing "hurt" her jaw and they blew hers out...hehe!) and got to bring home a perfectly good egg that was completely empty. Les told us that God rolled the stone away from the grave for US! Clearly, Jesus in his resurrection body could've walked right through that stone that had been rolled in front of the tomb! God chose to move the stone so that we could believe in him and see for ourselves the miracle of Easter morning. The tomb was empty: except for the neatly folded grave clothes that had been left behind. 

I have gotten in the habit of giving God the credit for the small miracles and the bigger ones. When I find that perfect parking spot I thank him; when my husband gets back and forth to the hospital to visit I thank him; when the girls get to church without fighting (!!!) I thank him, and the list goes on. I have always thanked him for the BIG stuff but it's great to thank him for the little stuff, too. It keeps me close to God when I am in constantly talking to him. I find that my days are just plain better when God and I tackle the day. I am thankful that he cares about my every thought... listens to my every prayer... and always has time for me. 

Singing for Freedom

There's a song by Run Kid Run that expresses how I feel most Sunday mornings. It's called "Singing for Freedom". 

I come to church with a to-do list a mile long. If I wrote it down, it would look something like this:

1. pick up entire house

2. wash breakfast dishes

3. finish laundry

4. take nap immediately after church

5. help someone with homework

6. cook a delicious, nutritious and speedy lunch for 5 or more to consume in 15 minutes or less

7. drive someone to basketball; cheerleading, or some youth group activity

etc....

I come into church expecting that I will have time to free myself from the agony of my busyness. Instead, my brain continues to labor over all the stuff I should be doing... I know you've felt like this at times in your life because all of us have. We waste time trying to manage our thoughts long enough to force ourselves into a relaxed state. Sounds crazy, doesn't it?

Here's a new idea. What if we went to church expecting to be blessed? to worship? to praise? to rest in Jesus? What would our lives resemble then? I believe we would resemble our Lord Jesus Christ. I want to be Jesus' representative on earth, not just another woman running around with a mile-long list of things to do. I crave the stillness and the silence of a heart focused on the Lord. 

Here's the link to the song: